Cement soup" is a perfect way to describe that watery mess they had to deal with.

I get the router idea, but that just adds another setup and a bunch of dust collection. For simple straight cuts on sheet goods, a good track saw is hard to beat. It's one tool, one cut, done. My table saw sled collects dust for jobs like that now.

Honestly, I talk to my plants just so I don't feel like a crazy person when I'm alone in my apartment. My spider plant is thriving, but that might be because I finally remembered to water it. I'm pretty sure my compliments are just for my own benefit.